Letters from Past Retreat Clients
Here are real testimonials from real people. Posted below are unsolicited messages sent to us by couples who attended a Private Retreat with John.
And there’s still more feedback about us…
- What Relationship Experts say about John’s work →
- Testimonials about our Virtual Retreat programs →
- Feedback on John & Hazal’s Special Retreat Program →
I don’t know how to begin to thank you for all you did for my partner and me, and our relationship. We came to you seeking help and understanding, and what we left with was far beyond our highest expectations. You possess exceptionally unique skills for moving people through difficult and sensitive topics and situations with both competence and empathy, yet with strength and conviction. Your passion and love for your work emanates through you.
The amount of work and preparation you did on all sorts of levels was apparent. I felt very confident that we were working with a consummate professional in the area of relationships and personal growth, development, and healing.
I have been doing a lot of reflecting and soul-searching since spending those precious three days with you. I believe the greatest gift I took away from it was a personal and spiritual wakeup call. I was awakened to see who I am and what I need to do to grow individually and through my relationship. I was awakened to who my partner is and his needs. I’m able to appreciate and listen to him in an entirely different way. I now have new tools for dealing with situations as they arise. I truly believe that we’re becoming soulmates as a result of our time and experience with you.
Words cannot express my thanks and gratitude.
Diane R. Ludgate, Ph.D., Psychologist / Corporate Trainer
“Hi John. I just wanted to reach out and let you know that, one year after our retreat, my husband and I are doing fantastically! Our relationship is everything we have both hoped it could be and more. I’m not saying we don’t disagree and birds aren’t always chirping around our heads, but anytime we find ourselves in “distress” we use the tools you taught us with each other immediately. We even laugh because sometimes he will come home stressed from work and he will just come up and gaze in my eyes as we chant some of the things we learned from you. I can’t tell you how you have changed our lives and interactions for the positive. We learned so many lessons and even apply what we have learned to our children. The information we learned about childhood needs has also been utilized on our new grandbaby. You are so appreciated and valued! I hope you are well and happy. Thank you again . . . .”
“. . . . Hi John. Now two years after our retreat with you, my husband and I are still living the most connected, happy life with each other and our family. COVID provided extra bonding time with our children and we still love them. LOL. Thank you again for our retreat to closeness. I hope you have been healthy and happy as well.”
— M and S, Contractor / Real Estate
We’re in the final stages of completing the film (it includes our coaching session with you). Having the opportunity to hear your words so many more times as we edit it. Wow. We feel so lucky.
Raine and I are thriving. We just worked beautifully through an ‘ouch’ this morning. Amazing. You’re a genius. I mean, just being able to cut through the mud and tell each other how to repair rifts and when doing so modeling to the kids how to be, stopping a reactive cycle.
You’ve been a treasure for us.
— Chantal Kreviazuk and Raine Maida, Canadian Rock Star Couple
Widely known throughout Canada as popular singer/songwriters, Raine and Chantal have earned nearly every accolade their country can bestow, including a joint appointment to the Order of Canada.
See Chantal & Raine’s interview with The Canadian Press on their documentary film — “I’m Going to Break Your Heart” — and watch a trailer that shows the marriage coaching they got working with John.
“Hi John, This note is way overdue. Thanks so much for the wonderful experience at our retreat. The set of tools you gave us has been incredibly valuable, and the more we practice using them, the richer our relationship becomes. What a gift! Thank you again.”
— L and P, Physicians
“Dear John, We both feel so fortunate to have found our way to you and your life-changing retreat. We came away with new found love and appreciation for each other, as well as confidence in a long and happy rejuvenated marriage for the remainder of our days. The tools and guidance you provided us for working through problem areas and reactivity are invaluable. Thank you for sharing your knowledge, expertise and experience in a format that truly enabled us to get far better ways to communicate with and nurture each other.”
— S and J, Construction / Consulting
“You saved our relationship. We really couldn’t have done it without you. We were going down into a deep hole. We were stuck and could not have come through it without your help. As far as we are concerned, you saved the relationship. So much so, that we’ve been giving your book as wedding presents. And if we could afford it, we would give your retreat to all couples we love. Your work is invaluable.”
— O and S, Mediator / Lawyer
“We were truly at a crossroad in our marriage. You gave us the tools we needed to communicate effectively, to have an understanding and appreciation for each others thoughts, personalities and needs. Through using these tools we have been able to heal old wounds and begin laying the foundation for a new, strong and healthy marriage. The knowledge you gave us is beyond words. Not only have we begun to understand our individual underlying fears and desires (and how to communicate them with each other), we are very excited to start applying this information to the way in which we communicate with and nurture our children.”
— B and A, Executive / Sales Rep
John, I wanted to reach out to you and let you know how much I appreciate what you did three years ago. I am happy to report that my wife and I are doing great. We use your techniques every day. Hope all is well with you.
— G and K, Small Business Owners
Hi John, I just wanted to let you know that we just had our six year anniversary from your intensive marriage retreat that we attended in November of 2014 and we are still going strong. We still use your tools to this day and still have our commandments displayed on our wall as a daily reminder. We have navigated through some major life changes in the past six years, specifically in the past two we moved out of state and across the country, sold our business and have both recently retired. I was so grateful to come across an email you sent me back in 2017 that brought me back to your website. I just used your repair process on an issue we just had last week and I was happy to see I remembered most of what you taught me, to step back, listen, assess and repair what I was doing and saying. I have now bookmarked your website so as not to lose it again and to use as a refresher and reminder of all that I love about my husband. I was just talking about our retreat to our neighbor this past weekend and was so pleased to be able to forward her your information and to see that you are still helping couples even amongst COVID 19. Forever grateful for your guidance and expertise!
— M and W, Retired
“Your retreat greatly improved our marriage. We were anxious when we got there. But we quickly became comfortable in your presence. You showed us how to resolve issues which had been threatening our stability as a couple. You taught us tools we continue to use over the year since our retreat with you. This has helped us increase happiness, and kept us from falling back into old traps. We are very grateful.”
— A and C, Construction Engineer / Educator
“Thank you so much for giving us so many tools to improve our relationship. When we came to you we were in a stalemate. It seemed that there was no way to communicate. We got preoccupied by being busy and we didn’t even make time to try anymore. After the retreat with you, we did not only learn to open up communication again. We found ourselves sharing a whole new honeymoon all over again!”
— J and V, Medical Administrator / Doctor
“Hello John. I have been meaning to write you for a year now, following the private retreat my wife. I am sincerely sorry to have taken so long, because you deserved to know much sooner than this how much those few days changed our lives. Our instances of conflict have diminished to almost zero ever since we met with you, and our closeness has sky-rocketed. And it seems to only get better every day…. My Lord! Such a simple thing, but such a world of difference… in how much we now trust each other; in the peace and calm and love we feel as we move on to our days; in how we can talk through problems; and, stunningly, in the increased sexual attraction we feel toward each other, and the pleasure we derive when we make love. Which we both look forward to now more than ever. All in all, we cannot thank you enough. If every married couple could spend a couple of days with you, the world would be a much, much happier place.”
— A and T, Graphic Designer / Software Engineer
“Our retreat was utterly extraordinary, simply magnificent. John is a superbly skilled, wise, authentic, supportive guide. His program is magnificently suited to genuine transformation. The shifts we experienced, the understanding that emerged, and the capacities that we steadily and rapidly built, all went far beyond our wildest expectations of what could happen between two severely wounded, alienated people in a few days. What did happen was an undeniable breakthrough. It was facilitated by John’s incomparable presence, knowledge, ability to tune in to each of us and support us to bring forward our best. The intensive format worked amazingly well at safely revealing and healing toxic patterns. The tools we were given are priceless, elegant, simple, and they really work. The schedule, the homework, the containment, the safety, and the setting were all so supportive each step along the way. Our hearts are again open to each other; it feels like a miracle, but it’s very grounded and real. I feel as if I’ve found my dearest friend again, still alive and breathing, and still in love with me, thank God. Moreover, I also regained access to my own sense of wholeness. I have opened up in ways I’ve been yearning for. This retreat has been a total blessing on every level. Thank you.”
— D and T, Therapist / Coach
“We did not know what to expect at your retreat, whether it would be ineffective like counseling had been, or overbearing like on TV talk shows. What we found was compassionate, authentic and supportive, a coach that could mentor us in new tools and show us ways out of the box we were stuck in. It was like a visit with the wise friend we always wish we had, who could help us through our rough spots back to the love we originally shared.”
— D and M, Executive / Nurse
“We were stuck in a place where we fought over stupid things. I felt so resentful that intimacy had long ago stopped. We could be civil, but we felt the happiness we used to have was lost. Your retreat helped us move through some big blocks, understand new things, and heal issues we couldn’t talk about. I discovered things about him I didn’t know even after a decade of marriage! Deep, wonderful things. It’s like I found the great guy I originally met, only more so.”
— L and R, Mother / Hall of Fame Athlete
“I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the great help you offered us. We felt like we were on a real honeymoon, after we left our retreat with you. And it is now two years later, and we still feel blissfuly happy, being able to connect in different ways, with still many things to explore. Somehow I still feel as if a miracle had happened in a big way with you as a wonderful and dedicated guide. Once again I want to express my deep gratitude for your fantastic help! Amazing things you taught us, and so many helpful tools. We are in an unbelievable different mood. No longer bickering or fighting! Instead we experience enjoyment, happiness and thankfulness for the deep connection and love we found again.”
— H and C, Director / Musician
“The retreat opened doors for us to renew the spark. We had grown complacent. We are now growing more happy and passionate with each day. The same outside stresses are still there in our lives, children and work. But the tools you gave us help us to check in with each other on a daily basis, in ways that open our hearts to each other and refresh our love for each other. Thank you so much for this gift!”
— J and R, Architect / Consultant
“We greatly appreciate all your work with us in our retreat with you. We both learned a great deal. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted now that I don’t have a secret sadness/loneliness. I also now know that my partner really cares. You have a great gift – thank you for all your work with us. You helped us to really understand ourselves and each other – and to put value in our connection and relationship.”
— G and L, Entrepeneur / Mother
“The retreat was a great experience, with excellent organization and materials. Our retreat is a turning point in our relationship. It will be remembered as the place we got the tools to move into a loving and nurturing relationship. And given where we were when we got there, I’d say this… Even if a partner thinks they might not want to go to a couples retreat, how could you possibly go wrong in going?”
— J and K, Sales / Real Estate
“Before we arrived, I feared that if this retreat doesn’t work, I don’t know what will! I also was afraid we’d be bashing each other the whole time. That’s how it usually has been with therapy. We always got stuck getting into upsets. We’ve seen four different therapists and it never got anywhere. I think I’m in a little bit of shock about how different this feels. We’re so open to each other again. Now I feel we are very connected, even more than when we first had our kids and were so happy. I feel like a huge weight has been taken off. I feel like I can trust we can really hear each other and care for each other. We finally know what makes each other work. I feel we’re a team, and that’s always been everything I’ve always wanted, and now we know how to do it. One thing I learned about myself is that I say an awful lot, but I wasn’t really communicating well. Now we know how to be a team. And we have the tools. When we first got to the retreat, we could barely look at each other. We were not touching or holding each other any more. Now we just stare at each other and smile. And hug. It’s like we got our love lives back.”
— N and L, Technical Writer / Interior Designer
“It’s been months since our retreat with you. As the weeks have passed I’ve thought about emailing you to say once again ‘Thank You!’ The work we did during our retreat has filtered every aspect of our lives even with friends and extended family. Our love for each other has continued to become even more respectful, caring, and loving. I’m astounded by how much that weekend changed our dynamics, our triggers, our issues. I just can’t put into words what this has meant to us. My husband has become the partner I always wanted to be with and I think I have become the partner he has always wanted to share his life with. I’m in such gratitude of your work!”
— L and M, Realtor / Executive
“This is our one year anniversary of renewed happiness and wedded bliss, thanks to our couples retreat with you. Before we came, we fought all the time and lacked any intimacy. We had nothing in common outside of our children and work. And we couldn’t go on like that. You taught us how to understand each other and most importantly how to communicate with each other. Your help last year transformed our relationship. We have never been happier with each other. We’ve learned to love and laugh again. We cannot thank you enough.”
— W and M, CPA / CPA
“We would like to thank you. Your incredible knowledge, expertise, and ability to communicate and apply it to our particularly complex and difficult dilemma, has proven to be nothing short of a miracle for us. We are quite amazed. We are successfully using all the tools you gave us, with great satisfaction. I am not anticipating the necessity of a return visit, but it is comforting to know that if we ever needed a refresher retreat, you are there. You are, by far, a world-class coach for couples in distress!”
— B and R, Engineer / Artist
“I really didn’t know what to expect, but hoped your retreat would help. Not only did it help, it was life and relationship changing. I feel more connected than ever to my wife. I’d say it really doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together (we’ve been married 20 years) the tools and lessons learned in this retreat would help anyone. Thank you!”
— E and D, Accountant / Dental Hygienist
“You far exceeded my expectations and I had high hopes to start with. This was a game changer. After 26 years with my partner, to learn new things about him was amazing. I can easily say this has changed the course of our marriage and life in general. I feel like we found something we have been searching for. The tools to find mutual happiness!”
— M and B, Shop Owner / Radio Announcer
“Before attending my husband and I had already given up on each other. I was attempting to get my emotional needs met elsewhere, and my husband was on the verge of getting his physical needs met elsewhere. We were not even speaking. And my husband swore he would not be participating in the retreat. But after a few hours we let our guards down. The content was amazing, both scientific-based and emotionally intelligent, grabbing both our attention! We learned to communicate and understand each others’ needs. Honestly, we have fallen in love again, mad the marriage a safe place, a real home for both of us. Thank you so much!”
— G and S, Bookkeeper / Contactor
“It’s been many weeks since our retreat with you. Our love for each other continues to become even more respectful, caring, and loving. I’m astounded by how much that weekend changed our dynamics, our triggers, our issues. My husband has become the partner I always wanted to be with and I think I have become the partner he has always wanted to share his life with.”
— C and A, Dentist / Homemaker
“I was unsure what to expect. But now I can safely say that the retreat has blown me away with its simple tools that make such powerful changes. Three days with John was much more useful than the two years we spent in marriage therapy.”
— J and H, CEO / Marketing
And there's still more feedback about us...