-- Question for John --
I’m really stupid on how to get a conversation started with a girl I am attracted to because the worst thing you can do is freeze up and not say anything. This is what I do, then I’m in trouble. Wo what I’m asking is for some advice on what to say to a girl when I meet her. I can say “Hello… How are you?….” but then I have no idea whatsoever what to say next!!!
I’m asking for your help on some things to say to a girl….
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-- Answer from John --
There are no specific “Things to Say to Girls” — you just have to wing it. One way is to become a good listener — and figure out some general questions to ask her about what she likes in life and what interests her. For instance, you can ask “What movies have you liked?” — then you listen to what she says — and you say “Yeah, I liked that too.” or whatever comes to you — then you can ask “What did you like about that movie?” — or “What was your favorite part of it?” — and so on. Then ask about movies she would like to see.
Think of this as an example. Come up with a list of ten different things you can ask about. Classes at school. Sports things. Fashions. Movie stars. Music stars. TV. Whatever you can think of. Don’t rush or force the discussion to move forward at a fast speed. Just relax and give it time. And whenever you feel like you have something to say about any of these topics, about what you like or don’t like, then add that in.
Most people talk about topics most of the time. You probably already know what you like or don’t like about several topics, so you already have a lot of information about what you might say. The trick is to make it into a discussion. Usually, both people are in the dark about how to do that. So if one person knows the secret to keeping a conversation going, then they will become very popular.
The secret is simple: ASK QUESTIONS…. and then just listen.
Also, a 2nd secret, so secret that most people never learn it: BE COMFORTABLE when there is just silence for awhile.
A final secret, which very few ever get to: BE COMFORTABLE making eye contact.
Let me know how it goes….